so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
