How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
