the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
