Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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