morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
