he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
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