I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
he shaved USA in his pubs
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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