Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
