I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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