Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I think a kid would responsible me up
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
