think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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