Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
