ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
