i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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