you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
