The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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