She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
The beer is more important than you right now.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
