Duck Duck Cougar?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
