He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
You need Xanax blowdarts
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
