OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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