last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
