he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
