did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
