Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
