I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
