Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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