Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize