I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
