Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
