I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
i believe in u and ur pee
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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