It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
