Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
