quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
