Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize