She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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