peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Randomize
