sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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