mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Randomize
