normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
