Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
