i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
