Just fell off a train. Bad.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
