He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
