How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
