Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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