omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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