So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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