I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
