Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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