That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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