I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Randomize