She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize