Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
