I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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